A while back, I wrote an article on this site which I entitled “The Evangelist.” In the article, I explained about a new friend whom I had met, and I told about how I was such an Evangelist on the topic of making money online that sometimes I went overboard on the topic, sometimes turning off people, even scaring them away. I’ve been thinking about this topic more lately, and I decided that it is something I wanted to write at least one more article about.
I was just thinking a while ago that Evangelism in regards to earning money has actually caused me to lose friendships, or put friendships in jeopardy! How? Well, read on.
I have a friend who seems to be always in desperate need for money. He just doesn’t earn enough money, and he is usually very open about it. It seems like almost everytime I see the fellow, he goes on and on about how short his money is. I feel bad for him. In the past, this fellow, who I consider to be a very good friend, has told me that he wants to earn money on the Internet as I do. So, I have done my best to help him.
In the past, I have had him over to my house a number of times for several hours each time in an effort to teach him ways of earning a living online. He always seems to understand what I tell him, and he is very strong in saying that he intends to do what I say. He has websites. However, when I go to his sites and look, he seems to be doing the opposite of what I teach him. It is almost as if he is trying to poke me in the eye, saying that he just does not care what I tell him, he is not going to do what I say.
Well, when I think about it, I realize that this fellow is under no obligation to follow what I advise him to do. However, I also know that the way he does things, he simply won’t be able to earn any money online. When I see him, he is always asking me what he should do. But, as I say, when I tell him what to do, he seems to ignore what I say. So, it confuses me.
For a while, it got to the point that I felt resentment for the fellow. I was spending my time, precious time that I don’t have a lot to spare, to help my friend. Then, when I would see that he was ignoring me, it would make me feel angry that I was wasting my time with him. Either he did not understand what I told him, he didn’t care what I told him, or he forgot what I told him. Even though I would follow up, and he would always say he was going to do it – it just never happened. As I say, I resented it. Even though this guy was one of my best friends, it got to the point that I felt angry at him.
This is just another example of being too much of an Evangelist. It’s like if you were a religious Evangelist, and you preached to somebody, and they did not follow the teachings that you told them, you can’t force them! The time comes when you just have to wash your hands of it, let the person follow his own way, and feel no ill toward him.
That is where I have decided to go with this fellow I am speaking of today. By the way, I just want to clarify that this person that I am writing about now is not the same person that I wrote my original “Evangelist” article about. That person is actually following my advice, and he is learning. Slowly, but he indeed is learning, and he is thankful for my help. I like helping a person like that. Even if the steps are small ones, you can see progress. That makes me feel good.
My plan with this person, though, is that I want to go back to just being a friend. When he asks me to help him with his Internet earning, I’ll just brush it off and not offer my advice, because doing so, and having me ignore him will only make me upset, and will end up destroying our relationship. It’s better to just be friends than to try to be his teacher. We’ll both be happier that way!
Hi Bob – Am now into the marketing research portion of doing my “due diligence” for setting up a tax practice for expatriate clients. Still a long way to go – research on the marketplace is pretty difficult from a long distance. Plenty of anecdotes and internet comments, but I’ll have to put some “personal appearances” in here and there.
You, and a few of your fellow entrepreneurs there have sparked and relit the fire! 😉 I have to thank you and your business model!
Hi Paul – I believe that doing taxes for expats living in the Philippines. There would be a fair amount of demand, I believe. Keep plugging away, I think you have a winner there.
I truly understand where your coming from,i have the same problem.When i decide to run with an idea,i can’t stop talking about it. My friends have a favourite response “Chas,change the record for a while “.
Helping friends is always difficult,even after advice many just do things there own way,some think they have developed a better way.
I understand your frustration,but i’m afraid its a mystery of life.
This little story kind of sums it up.
A Gold prospector finds a rich seam of gold and decides to share his find with his best friend.He tells his friend “Go and buy a shovel and come and dig with me”.His friend replies ” Have you seen the price they want for shovels these days”.
Hi chas – Well… shovels are indeed expensive these days! 😉
That’s a great story, my friend. Yes, I don’t know why, but people like you and I just can’t be happy without really pushing our way too much. Even though it will work, it might not be what others want!
We know we are right though, don’t you think? 😆 Well… let me change that – I’m right, not sure about you! 😀
Ha Ha, My mum says i always THINK i’m right,LOL
Hi chas – You know… I am not as bad as you then. I don’t always think I’m right. One time, I actually thought I was wrong. After I looked further into it, though, I found that that I was right after all! 😀
With humble apologies, neither of you is right. It’s perfectly obvious that I am the one that is right. You both should really pay attention. 🙂
Advice is a funny thing. Just last week I emailed Bob asking for advice about banner advertising on a particular website of mine. He responded with what I thought was good sound advice. Now here’s the funny part: I’m actually following it and it appears that it is going to work. 🙂
Uh, people, when you ask an expert for help, you just might want to consider following what they offer.
Hi Tom – That’s great news! I hope that your new endeavor does work out well for you!